Single at Christmas

For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace. Isaiah 9:6 NASB


Though I am very happily married now, for most of my adult life I checked the box single when asked about marital status on various forms. When my son was four years old, he and I began a new life alone together which lasted until he left for College. Though being a single mother had its challenges, I can honestly say those years are filled with some of the most precious memories that will forever be tucked away in my heart.

Although I enjoyed my single status most of the time, it was during various holiday’s when loneliness would set in. Christmas was a challenge for many reasons, but was probably the most difficult holiday for being single.

I wish to honor all single people this Christmas by offering a few suggestions that will make this incredible season much more joyful and fun.

Single it together…

Some of my most memorable Christmas’s were celebrated with lots of people getting together at my home or the home of someone else for a giant potluck, complete with singing Christmas carols and exchanging gifts. Nothing says family quite like getting together with other single folks who genuinely want to spend time together. No bickering, no discontent, just good ole fashion fun and merriment.

Try it. Gather as many friends as you can find, especially those you think are having difficulty this Christmas, and throw a big potluck party! It is never expensive because everyone will bring something. Have a blast!

Serve someone…

It’s often much easier to gather single friends at the last minute, so I encourage you to do so not only for a party, but in order to serve your community as well. There were many times a bunch of us would gather together to serve the homeless at soup kitchens, on downtown street corners and the like. Serving someone in need will always take your eyes off of yourself to refocus on the true meaning of Christmas.

After filling your joy-o-meter by serving others, get together for a cup of something warm to reminisce about the evening’s event and plan your next gathering. Sounds like fun doesn’t it?

Church services…

One of my fondest memories is when our single’s ministry would gather together as a family along with our children for a Christmas Eve candlelight service. My son and I would volunteer as greeters and pass out candles as the congregation arrived. Following an amazing service honoring our Saviors’ birth, we would gather at a friend’s home for a cup of something warm and a treat. It was truly a special way to celebrate Christmas in honor of the birthday boy.

Please do not be alone…

If you are a person who checks the box “single” and find yourself a bit lonely this Christmas season, I strongly encourage you to do one or more of the above. I promise you will find much joy in celebrating this Christmas when you gather with others who would also love some good company.

Don’t know many single folks? No problem, check with your church or a church nearby to find out if there is a singles ministry that could use your help. You may be just the person they need to help create a joyous Christmas celebration.

Short notice? No problem. Single people are the most spur of the moment people I know. Make a few phone calls, send a few e-mails or put out a message on Facebook. I have no doubt you will find some takers for a spur of the moment gathering.

This holds true for other occasions too! Hey, New Years Eve is just around the corner.

What ever you decide to do this Christmas, please do not spend it alone. Satan loves it when we do that, but God wants us to celebrate His Son with others. You may be just the blessing someone else needs.

Merry Christmas!


Father God, I thank You for the joy of this season. Though we’re not sure exactly when Your Son was born, I pray this celebration of His birth brings honor and glory to Your Holy Name. Happy birthday Jesus!! Amen.

In His embrace,



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Thank you for sharing, liking and as always for your thoughts.

6 comments to Single at Christmas

  • Samantha  says:

    Thank you so very much for your heart and words of encouragement. This is by far the hardest Christmas on my yet, Chad is gone on a SAREX for two days, then comes home just to leave and go to my X’s house for 4 days…and my divorce was finalized on Dec 24th, 5 years ago-wow did that go fast!!!
    So my plan is to do just what you said, find someone to serve all weekend. Have Church on Friday night/Saturday night for the Candlelight service and off to a good friends for Christmas dinner.
    LOVE YOU and really really appreciate you!!!

    • Toni  says:

      Dearest Samantha,

      Your words have lingered since the first time I read them a couple of hours ago. I needed to think on them and pray about how to respond. I am so thankful this post has been encouraging to you. I am also very thankful to know you are now 5 years past the past. Even though divorce stinks (been there), there is a way to re-frame the negative thoughts if we choose. Rather than thinking of December 24th as the anniversary of your divorce, maybe you can think of December 24th as the anniversary of your re-birth and the discovery of who Samantha Stout truly is. December 24th can now be a day to reflect on what the Lord of all creation is molding and shaping you into. He has such big plans for you Sam!!! You are a blessing to many!! Never forget that. Jesus loves you so much!!
      Merry Christmas my friend!! Big hugs back at ya!

      • Trease  says:

        Well said my friend. Remembering many gatherings with you and small group family. Your reply shows Gods words coming through you. Thankyou Toni for sharing your beautiful heart. God bless you and the family. Merry Christmas and to my friend Samantha too.

        • Toni  says:

          Love you Trease!!!

  • Marjorie  says:

    Although I am not single, I believe your thoughts on things to do can resonate in each of us – helping those less fortunate, picking up the phone and getting a warm and relaxing group together, focus on all of the good in our lives, and attending church services. You have such a knack for eloquently writing and touch everyone who reads it. Thank you, Toni.
    Merry Christmas!

    • Toni  says:

      Thank you so much Marjorie!! Praying God’s best for you always!!

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